Learn repentance slowly

The Sacrament of Repentance and Confession is a holy sacrament by which the sinner returns to God, confessing his sins before the priest to be absolved through the authority granted to him by God. By this absolution the confessing person is granted the forgiveness of those sins which he confessed.

Confession means admitting and declaring what is true. The Sacrament of Confession means verbal confession before the priest of sins committed, with humility and repentance, in order to receive absolution and forgiveness.

Our Lord Jesus Christ founded the Sacrament of Repentance and Confession when He said to His disciples: "Assuredly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 18:18).

After the Resurrection He breathed on them and said: "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained" (John 20:21–23).

By this He gave the Church authority — through the Holy Spirit — to bind and loose sins according to the truthfulness of the repentance.

True repentance has four conditions: a contrite heart and remorse for previous sins; a steadfast intention to improve; strong faith in Christ and hope in His love to forgive; and verbal confession of sins before the priest.

The Lord said to His apostles: "If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained" (John 20:23). How can sins be forgiven or retained if they are not known? This is why verbal confession before the priest is required.

Human beings by nature require comfort and wise counsel, and the need to speak to someone regarding problems and worries. The priest, as spiritual father and keeper of secrets, provides exactly this.

St. Gregory of Nyssa said: "Regard the church priest as a spiritual father for you, reveal to him your secrets openly, just as a patient reveals his hidden wounds to the physician, and so is healed."

Many people try to escape confessing before a priest, claiming they confess directly to God. But the embarrassment experienced in confession is very profitable to the repenting sinner — through it we feel the true weight of sin committed in the presence of God.

Reasons for escaping confession before a priest are often pride and false dignity, for the proud find it hard to humble themselves. But Solomon said: "He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy" (Proverbs 28:13).

Be honest with yourself without bias. Examine your conscience carefully — in deeds, words, thoughts, and senses — and repent so that you may not fall again.

Do not hide sins or excuse yourself by blaming others. Jeremiah speaks to the soul: "Pour out your heart like water before the face of the Lord" (Lamentations 2:19). When water is poured forth, it leaves no trace. Pour everything out.

Follow the guidance and spiritual remedies given by your confession father. After repentance and absolution, thank God and remain watchful.

Before confession: sit with yourself carefully. Pray for God to reveal your sins. Write down what you need to confess so you do not forget. Confession should not be delayed more than a month.

During confession: speak clearly, begin with the more serious sins, do not tell unnecessary stories, and receive the priest's counsel as medicine for the soul. Be mindful of the reverence of the sacrament.

After confession: pray the thanksgiving prayer, obey the guidance received, and watch over your spiritual life. As St. Basil said: "As we bear the scalpel of the physician to remedy the body, so also we must bear the suffering of rebuke and chastisement so that the soul may be remedied from its sins."

As a Father, he yearns for the repentance of each of his children. He resembles the father of the prodigal son who saw him while he was still far off, ran to meet him, and rejoiced at his return (Luke 15:20).

As a Judge, he discerns with the authority given by Christ — neither favoring nor neglecting — like a physician who loves the patient but hates the disease, and tries to treat it with the best possible remedy.

As a Teacher, he teaches the way to God and Christian perfection through Scripture, experience, and wisdom, making disciples of all who come to him — and being himself a disciple before he teaches.